Mar 17, 2008

Q. You meet a good woman who has her stuff together. You click with her and see yourself with her. She is not the typical woman that you would date based on her physical appearance but she has all of the qualities that you find in a good woman. Why can you not commit?? Men say they want a good woman but when one comes along, they just ignore her and keep on using that "Player's Card".

- A Damn Good Woman

A. First of all, I think you know why the brother won’t commit. Please understand this; we do want a good woman. However, a good woman includes being appealing to the eyes. We sometimes may not want to admit it, but it’s the truth! Let’s face it, it would be nice to be with someone you can say “DAMN MY BABY LOOKING GOOD” day in and day out. I'm not trying to take a way from your beauty because I’m sure you’re a beautiful individual, but if you’re not the typical individual he would date then you might wanna look else where. He’s not ignoring you…………He’s just not interested. Don't take it as rejection just consider it a blessing in disguise. If he can't appreciate you for who you are then he doesn't deserve you anyway. Stop trying to force something that shouldn't be. Stop wasting you time on a man, that if you get him, is not going to appreciate you. If I was you I wouldn't even be sweating this dude. The bottom line is, when God created you, he did so with a plan in mind. I say this to say once you let him order your steps then some one will eventually come along and appreciate all the things that you bring to the table. My pastor once said (YES, I GO TO CHURCH) when we go through, go through with the understanding that “Everything is working for your own good." So, flip the script on him and let him go!!!!!!!!!!!!! Remember as a BLACK WOMAN: YOU ARE A QUEEN! And every queen deserves a king that will respect her for who she is.


*** The views expressed by ThePlayer does not reflect the views of The Savvy Sista. ThePlayer will be answering your questions every Monday and Wednesday. He can be reached at


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