Aug 21, 2009


 
While in the airport for my flight to Denver, I decided to stop at one of the newstands to grab a magazine to read.  I was perusing the different magazines when the glorious face of Idris Elba caught my eye.  Now, you know I'm a sucker for Idris so I had to pick the magazine up.  The magazine I picked up turned out to be the August issue of Essence magazine.  Now, it's been months since I let my subscription to Essence lapse so I wasn't sure if I wanted to support the publication by giving them my money, but the allure of Idris in that white lines shirt was too much for a sista to bare.  I had to have it if only to bask in his divine masculinity.  Lord have mercy...LOL!!!
 
So, once I got pass the cover (you know it took me a few minutes), I decided to check out the contents of the magazine.  Of course I was expecting much since it was the lack of content as to why I allowed my fourteen year subscription to my once favorite magazine expired.  It was during my scan when I came across a very fascinating article entitled Black Women Behaving Badly.  That article resonanted with me so much that I decided to dedicate an entire show this upcoming Sunday on to it.
 
The dynamics between black women is something that is very confusing.  I could never understand how women that can hold up an entire community can have such disdain and contempt for each other.  Where does this distrust stem from?  Why are we so weary of one another?  I mean come on, we've all heard the whispers, "Who do she think she is...", "B!tch thinks she's all that....", "I'll take your man..." and the list goes on.  Trust me, if you haven't heard someone saying this stuff then you are probably the one saying it.  Where does this insecurity stem from?  I realize that this is not a problem only facing the black community, but since I am a resident of said community it is the aspect in which I would like to focus.
 
So, I'm asking everyone to please tune in to Savvy Talk Radio this upcoming Sunday August 23, 2009 at 6 pm EST as we begin to tackle this very tough topic.  I wish to have the input of all my readers so if you would like to share your experience (good or bad) please feel free to leave a comment in the 'Comment Section.'  I'm also looking for people to take part in the live panel discussion.  So if you are interested please feel free to send me an email telling me a little about yourself and why you think you would be perfect to have on the panel for this topic.   
 
 
Savvy Talk Radio w/ The Savvy Sista is a talk radio show that discusses the hottest issues going on in the community.  Whether it's topics covering relationships, politics, economics, etc, it will be covered on Savvy Talk Radio.  The show takes place every Sunday from 6-8 pm EST.  You may listen to the live show by calling 718-664-6383.  If you wish to ask a question or make a comment during the show just press "1" on your phone's keypad.  You can also listen to the show on the internet by going to www.blogtalkradio.com/thesavvysista and participate in the live chat room.

12 comments:

  1. I am soooo glad that I can vent. I am at my wit ends with black women, and I am black. I am not wary of all of them, but a majority I stay away from.

    Its so sad for me because I believe in the health and well being of all people especially women and children. I am a woman who father abandoned her. My mother verbally, and physically abused me into adulthood because I resembled my father. I have been raped and molested, I have never had a loyal lover, I have been divorced twice and I am childless.

    On the flip side, I was baptized into the Body of christ as a baby and I refuse to denounce him. God made a way for me to forgive my abusers, he sent me to college, he shielded me when I entered the Air Force , I went through the ranks and fought in desert storm. I moved to Atlanta and tried to record a album, and launch a fashion line.

    That is where I saw the true face of black women. In the midst of cattiness, bickering, jealousy, and pettiness. Here I stand with the natural talent to write,sing,make jewelry, fashion design and simply

    teach, the way we were taught by our ancestors and elders.

    I can't seem to find any young black women who want to rise above anything else than premarital sex, hair, nails, somebody else's money, babydaddy's, and nails.

    This mentality is in classes.

    Its frustrating because I know plenty others who are pioneers in their own rite and can't seem to relate to generation X.

    I almost on the verge of accepting that these are the last days and letting my sistas fall into their own ditches.

    As a consolation prize I guess, plenty of white men and women invest into my talents and want me to participate in the culture exchange.

    That scares me because I don't want them to do to me what they do to Obama. Commission me for a position, then try to mentally lynch me after I lower my guard.

    Gosh, sometimes I wish I was the color of air.

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  2. Black women do not hate each other. It all stems from jealousy,and jealousy then turns into hate. We all have something in particular that we don't like about ourselves,we can't change it, so we point out another womans flaws, not always flaws though, they will find anything wrong with someone else to make themselves feel better. I have always been talked about, never bothered me at all. I was quiet,lightskinned, and pretty. Wow! Quiet-she thinks she's too good, Lightskinned-she thinks she's pretty, Pretty-well hell I couldn't help that..lol I never thought I was better than anyone, but thats the mentality of some black women. I don't think we really take to competition well. It's like we are threatened when there's another black woman around, because you know its a possiblity that she has that same strong personality that black women possess and that could only mean one thing-Trouble...

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  3. It's very sad to say this but truthfully, black women have mistreated me more than anyone else. From my mother with her Narcississtic Personality Disorder, to black women abusing their authority by destroying my livelyhood, without valid reason nor remorse, on numerous occasions. So needless to say that my dislike is justified.

    The irony is that I'm a black woman. I'm to the point now where I can understand why black women are hated alot of times by black men as well as other races of people in general. I mean for the most part, they're bitchy, desperate, jealous, condescending, bullying, loud mouthed, ghetto, power/position abusers, users, cliquish, willfully ignorant etc. and the list goes on.

    So to solve my problem, most of my friends are men with the exception of two of my friends. One who has been my friend since elementary school. The other is latina, I've known her for ten years and she is a real sweetheart.

    Black women as well as the writers of topics like these really need to stop sweeping stuff under the rug, and stop sugar coating the truth. Just face the fact that black women (really blacks in general) needs to get up off of their prima dona butts and get some mental health counseling instead of coach pockets.

    I mean the 70% chance of black women not getting married AND the high ratio of black women being single parents, should spell to them that THEY HAVE THE PROBLEM!

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  4. Ive always pondered how we came to believe that black women held up the community. IF you look at our black communities, I dont see why we are constantly giving praise to a generation of blacks who continue to dominate as the poorest, most undereducated, most out of wedlock.

    We promote having multiple partners as if its something sexy.....Fastest cases of HIV, We use our asses instead of our heads as a form of empowerment, think emasculating our men makes us a "badd bitch" and call the ability to give good head a skill. Our daughters know how to bounce their booty but are failing school. We have survived, yes..but it fails in comparison to what can be defined as success.

    Our priorities are mixed up in acrylics and hair. We max out our credit cards to maintain a lifestyle we know damn well we cant afford...and act like we have NO life because we have to stay home longer than two hour and be a....MOTHER to our children. Think seducing married men and golddigging is a skill and trash other women as a past time.

    There are a few exceptions but the dominant fact still remains that we have failed our community and continue to fail our comunity as women. In order to change we must be willing to change our priorities and see integrity as an asset, not a liability.

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  5. Wow! Some of the comments are very disturbing. And yes, there is a kernal of truth in some. As a black woman myself, I have experienced both in and out of my racial sphere. When I used to work for a non-profit org. it was a black woman who blocked my promotion to bring up her gay white colleague. At the bank it was a combination of black man and white woman who tried to derail my success. Now at another bank that I work for it is an asian, white, and black women trying to derail my success. It's the same demon different faces- that's how I see it. If someone sees you doing better and they are threatened, they will try to take it away from you rather than work on their own successes. Misery loves company, and hate me because I chose to succeed!

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  6. Wow! Some of the comments are very disturbing. And yes, there is a kernal of truth in some. As a black woman myself, I have experienced both in and out of my racial sphere. When I used to work for a non-profit org. it was a black woman who blocked my promotion to bring up her gay white colleague. At the bank it was a combination of black man and white woman who tried to derail my success. Now at another bank that I work for it is an asian, white, and black women trying to derail my success. It's the same demon different faces- that's how I see it. If someone sees you doing better and they are threatened, they will try to take it away from you rather than work on their own successes. Misery loves company, and hate me because I chose to succeed!

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  7. I'm a young, educated, pretty black woman and I've never had a problem with other black women. They are normal people just like everyone else. Maybe some of you need to reevaluate yourselves and seek therapy for your blatant self hatred.

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  8. When someone "says" that they hate you, it's never personal. It has nothing to do with you. That person has an issue with themselves and they may hate that you represent what they want to be.

    Never take it personal!

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  9. I am a black woman and I HATE BLACK WOMEN! I am a very kind, warm and genuine person. Year after year, group after group, church after church, company after company, etc. I encounter the same attitudes, backstabbings, ghetto ness, two facedness, jealousy, niggishness and this and brought me great pain over the years. I can no longer ignore this because womeon of other nationalities DO NOT treat me this way, DO NOT carry themselves this way. They are kind, open, friendly, support my strengths and empathisize with my weaknesses WITHOUT going to some other black people and spreading whatever we talk about. I've recieved the very same treatment from my mother and siblings...pure rejection, jealousy and hatred over the years. No longer will my life and Holidays be filled with this activity. I've finally gained enough sense and courage to CUT THIS MESS OUT OF MY LIFE, NO MATTER WHO IS BRINGING IT!

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  10. I don't have any black women friends except the women in my family.

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  11. Articles like this make me really sad...its not that other races havent been as mean to me as black but it definitely hurts more because its you own. There have been many times where i was out minding my business and a black women close to my age will give me a dirty look or stare at me or snicker at me amongst their friends....I dont get it at all. I thought that we were past all this. And its a shame that we dont take the energy we put into hating on each other towards our education or creating jobs within our communities and being creative ....it sucks seriously.

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