Aug 9, 2011

With the statistics of black women remaining single reaching staggering numbers, there seems to be a push for black women to broaden their horizons as far as their dating prospects are concerned.  But for some reason, the broadening of their horizons seems to only go in the direction of white men.  You see it on all the websites and magazines that are targeting black women.  Even mainstream publications are taking a stab at it.  Recently, author Ralph Richard Banks wrote an article for the Wall Street Journal entitled An Interracial Fix for Black Marriage.  Banks made a lot of good points in his article, but this strong push for black women to go white is still interesting to me. 
Aren't there more men on the planet than black and white?  Why is it that this interracial dating push that's targeting black women only points to white men as an alternative to having a black man?  Maybe one of the problems in why a lot of black women are finding themselves single is because they limiting themselves culturally when it comes to black men?  There are plenty of black men on the planet in different countries from all types of backgrounds.  Sure it would be great to be with an African American man, but please don't sleep on those brothers over in France and England.  I mean seriously, what's hotter than a man with an accent?
I just think if black women are going to broaden their horizons then they should broaden all of their horizons and that includes traveling internationally.  If you feel the dating pool you are in is small than find a new one.  I know these things sound simple, but they are what have worked for me.  I have met and been entertained by some of the most fascinating men from all over the world whether they were Nigerian or British.  Men are men no matter where they come from.   
I just figure that as long as people are single, we are going to continue to have these debates.  People are always looking for an easy fix to some of life's toughest questions.  As long as someone comes up with a solution that the masses deem reasonable, they'll continue to make money off of someone else's misery.  Right now the push is for black women to date white men.  Who knows what the solution is going to be tomorrow.  My only advice is to do what makes you happy and continue to live in your own truth whether that is with a white man or by yourself.  Stop allowing people to make you feel bad about your situation and keep living. 


  1. I haven't seen nor heard of this push to go white. I hear people saying to consider other races but no preference for white. I think that we should broaden our horizons, not so much because of the "shortage" of African American men, but to just increase our options, you never know what great times lie ahead because we stepped outside of the box.

  2. There are some who believe that this black woman, white man push is more a matter of control of the black woman than anything else. Because of the history of white men/black women, most black women are not attracted to white men.

    And as I have read at other sites, some sisters that have dated white men find that they don't get that support against the racist haters from her white man. He's more like "don't let it bother you" and not one to stand up and fight against the racists for her.

    How would you feel sisters if you're strolling along with your white man, and a racist comes out and says something vile to you. Would you expect your man to step in and defend you? Call out the racist for you? Now what if he doesn't say a word to defend you?

    That's why I personally could not date a white man.

  3. My mind is racing with a million possible responses to all of this but I'll keep it as simple as I can.
    There was a time when ignorance dictated unfounded ideas about people of different ethnic backgrounds. Today, if you walk around with your brain switched on, it's clear to see that the top ten factors that might dictate a person's behaviour do not include skin colour. Racism, tribalism and all forms of separatism will unfortunately never die. People naturally look for reasons to separate themselves. The ego just works like that.
    I do not believe there is a fix for things like this. If a Caucasian man will idly stand by and watch while his peers insult his African woman, I would question his priorities. Whether or not he is racist, the vital point is that he is a coward and/or has no respect for the woman he’s with (and thus himself).
    Moral of the story, let your eyes see beauty, let your heart find it's rhythm but most importantly let your mind do what it was meant to do: think!
    He is more ignorant, who adheres to a second-hand opinion without scrutiny than he who for lack of understanding adheres to no opinion at all.